Zool III - Just when you thought it was safe to cancel
				your life membership....

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There was a flickering jerk, and the screen went blank. Then in faded
monochrome the word 'Interval' appeared, twitching sporadically like the death
throes of a marionette.

Brak Yorems fumbled under his chair for the box of popcorn he'd stashed away
for the interval. "Well, wadd'ya think so far?" asked the Space Invader {Ref :
So named after his rather peculiar jumper}. "Waste of space" said Brak between
mouthfuls of popcorn. "When you wanted to go and see Zool the death planet of
the etc. etc.{Please make a bit longer! I can't remember any more!}, I thought
it'd be some all-action futuristic Arnie film or
something. I wasn't expecting some introspective 1930's B-movie. Even the
music hall piano was out of tune!". Invader groaned, and started eyeing up the
two usherettes with their cute 'his and hers' ice cream dispensers. "You're
missing the point!" he said, "This is meant to be true to life. Maybe this kind
of film isn't so popular at the moment, so it might even be a bit out of date,
but it's a classic! This is one of the classics of the genre!". "OK", said
Brak, handing Space Invader the popcorn, "So what's the central theme? Is it
'Social Flops'? 'Sad failures'? 'Severe facial-hair'? Seems to me that it's
just a group of low budget entertainers trying to make themselves seem
important".

"No, no, no!" said Invader, getting frustrated. Beside them on the
balcony, the yogic flyer reached terminal velocity and leapt into the air, only
to gain more height than expected, shooting over the safety rail and
landing somewhere in the stalls {Ref : In his defense, his vision was obscured
by a mass of hair in mid-leap}. "It's easy to get cynical, I mean, just look at
the cast. But they're trying to make something new here, they're not afraid to
drop standard cinematic convention if it suits them!". Brak stood up. "I'm not
convinced. I'm off, before the second half starts". Despite Invaders protests,
he struggled past the groping backs of the folded cinema seats and pushed his
way out of the claustraphobic building and into the lobby. Behind him he heard
the strains of a badly tuned piano break into classic 'Evita', presumably
suggesting a plot shift to hotter climes. With a sneer of disdain he put on his
jacket and headed for home.

That night he found sleeping difficult. Tossing and turning in the oppressive
Oxford heat, his thoughts kept returning to that awful B-movie. Through half
opened eyes he suddenly noticed someone at the foot of his bed and sat bolt
upright. "Who're you?" he demanded. The gentleman was old beyond his years,
stooped, with an uncontrolled mass of hair, once black but now greying. On his
back rested a flourescent backpack, seeming to carry far more weight than its
volume would suggest. He fixed Brak with a shifty stare and droned with a
slight lisp. "I am the ghost of le Brarie past". He waved a Max O'Connor slip
demanding return of the Illuminatus trilogy as proof. "Before this night is
passed, you will realise the error of your ways, and will mock no more". Brak
started to shiver uncontrollably at the thought of a night with people like
this, but obediantly put on his jeans when the ghost beckoned towards them.
"Let us go" said the ghost somewhat unnecessarily, waving the library slip
spookily.

The scene wavers and wobbles in a wavery, wobbly way, and as focus returns we
see Brak and the ghost standing in the corner of a cramped room looking in.
Looming unrealistically over them stand ancient tottering shelves, literally
bursting at the cracks with musty books and old magazines. Folded into a chair
that has long ago given up its springs, clutching armfulls of bright plastic
cups, is a hairy figure, tall and lanky with defocussed eyes. "It's you!" says
Brak in a moment of realisation, but the figure does not hear. "Why do they not
come, my pretties?" croons the figure unhappily to his family of cups. "Why do
they not come?"

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Sooo....
		Will Brak be brainwashed into a totally new world view?
		Will we ever get to see the second half of "Zool etc."?
		Who is the mysterious librarian?
		Has Invader actually got a magic golden ticket?
		Where's all the footnotes?

All these questions and more, to be answered in the next episode of...
			    ....[ta da da da] Zool III!

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